Spring Cleaning Made Easier

I've always wanted the house to be clean before Holy Week and have never been able to make it happen. This year, I did it and the house actually feels bigger. I don't know if I made it to 40 bags over the 40 days. I may even have gotten more out of here. But the house is considerably lighter and getting rid of all that extra clutter really made it easier to clean.

I'm anticipating that it will make the house easier to keep clean.

The surprising result of decluttering-and this happens everytime I do a good one-it makes me less tolerant of any extra stuff. This doesn't bode well for the Easter baskets this year-sorry kiddies. I'm enjoying the clear spaces and ready to go another round after Easter. I haven't been bagging things up this week. I'm ready to exhale in anticipation of Holy Thursday through Sunday. I'm looking forward to spending some relaxed, quiet time with Mark and the kids and with my brothers and their families on Sunday. That's a first since "spagetti Wednesday"(our annual night-before-Thanksgiving gathering).

I'll be writing more about simplifying after the holiday.

Happy Easter.

Bookshelf Upate

I attended our local homeschool conference and curriculum fair. I didn't even peek at the used book sale-except to see if any of my unsold books were lying around. I took about 4 boxes of books (mostly 1 and 2 dollars-priced to sell) and made 50$! I'd say it was about 2 hours total worth of time marking them and hauling them and standing in line for the check. The people running the sale were very organized. Teenagers were helping unload and then put the books on the appropriate tables. I dropped the books off and filled out a registration form.  They did a lot more work for their 20% than I did for my 80%. A few of the things that didn't sell were books I'd be more likely to sell on Half.com anyway. I'll take a big pile to the library sale so it all was good.

As for new books...I needed math for 2 of the kids and I bought 2 other problem solving booklets for 3$ each. I got rid of about 3 boxes of books altogether.

Simplicity Parenting

If you are a parent and haven't read this book yet by Kim John Payne, don't waste another minute! I've read tons of parenting books, and "Simplicity Parenting" may be THE BEST, most practical, most articulate, most relevant parenting book of our time. I consider it a tool in the belt of anyone who is struggling to fight the tide of over-indulging, over-scheduling and over-obsessing about the kids. If you know that Less really is more but have a tough time explaining it to the other PTA moms or your parents or the aunts who think your kids are deprived because you don't take them to the dollar store for fun-buy this book.


I really hesitate to go into detail into any of it, because I can't possibly do it justice. The book, itself, is so clearly and thoughtfully written that I'll just defer. Payne articulates so well, with tangible support, things that I know to be true but I'll be darned if I can explain. 


He advocates creating a balance among 1) activity and busyness, 2) pauses and down time and 3) periods where the child is completely immersed in a pursuit for the pure enjoyment of it-(without you staging it). The kind of activity where he loses track of time. Payne discusses and supports why it's critical to make time for each of these. But the book covers lots more.


The other thing I love about the book is that he's just not hanging his hat on generalities. He doesn't say, "such and such will lead to burnout". Instead, he illustrates with sometimes brilliant analogies, how an imbalance and hyperparenting is so counterproductive.


I talk with a lot of parents about how invasive organized sports can be to our family even though the kids don't do a lot of them. I love to watch the kids on the field, court, whatever, but I get so resentful about the disruption to good dinners, regular bedtimes and the overall routine and wellness of the family dynamic. I've said all along, that I think kids would be much better off playing baseball in each others' backyards until they were 12 than starting T-ball when they were 4. It's crazy and unnecessary. Payne generally agrees and he gives solid support for it.


Since Mark teaches tennis for a living, all of the kids had a racket in their hands at a very early age. I resisted as long as I could to jump into the tournament "circuit" but I wish I would have waited longer. Hannah and Luke were 9 and 8 when they started playing tournaments. Generally, the parents are hyper-involved, obsessing about points and line calls and ranking. Tennis is unique in that it has no clock, kids keep the score themselves and it is self-officiated -unless there is a problem. That's a lot of pressure for any kid, let alone an 8 year old. I'm generally disenchanted with the tournament system for young players and think it's really odd that most of the kids who are playing at this level hardly ever just go out and play for fun. I think people must think I'm odd that the kids don't play more tournaments or every tournament. Finally, I have a resource to back up my intuition. I really don't care what other parents think but it's been challenging to articulate to Mark and the kids why I don't think it's a good thing to enter every tournament that comes down the pike. Naturally, they get caught up in the wave of expectation. "Everyone else is playing that tournament, why aren't you? It's double points!" 


Luckily, I don't have to deal with the too-muchness of school but this book gives me even more incentive to carve out time where we don't have anything scheduled. 


I've been reading snippets to Mark. He hasn't disagreed with anything so far and he's motivated to read it himself which I think will help in making simpicity a priority for him, too.

Approaching the Books

As a homeschooler, it's very difficult to let go of books. Some of the best homeschool support and reference books aren't typically available in the library. Curricula specific to homeschoolers is hardly ever available. The same goes for Catholic books, both fiction and non-fiction. Those are the main categories that I purchase the most and have the hardest time purging. And to be honest I looooooove the look, feel, even the smell of a good book in my hands. I'm attached.

This is a tough purge but I'm applying 4 criteria.

1) Is the resource readily available at the library? If so, I don't need it.

This standard helped me purge books like specific animal books (polar bears, bats, lions, etc.), some books about weather, planets, that kind of thing. This was easier to do if I decided that the quality of the book wasn't that great.

2) Have I used the resource often or within the past 2-3 years? (I think for other things one year is a good limit but with books, we often come back to a topic or time period a few years later as the younger kids revisit it ). If we did study the subject matter that the book covers, did we use this particular resource? If not, bah-bye.

3) Does the book have a schizophrenic quality. You know the kind, you open it and are assaulted with scads of pictures or drawings all over the 2 page lay-out with blurbs or captions for each small vignette.

Most Usborne and DK books are formatted in this way and some are good but generally, they give me a headache just looking at them and I think that presentation can be overwhelming. Come to think of it, most of the textbooks that the schools use have this format which is why I don't use them. Sensory overload, which is not what I'm looking for at this point. Less is more in this regard, too. I won't get rid of books like this if the kids have actually used and enjoyed them, though.

4) Do I need to apply the principles of detachment and trust? Abby Sascer has a great ebook available here in which she replaced the term decluttering for detachment. There's plenty of scriptural support for this principle and she makes a good case for it as well. I realize that if I don't detach from my stuff, including books, I'm not going to achieve order in my home. Things aren't totally chaotic here, far from it but there are things that we have to simplify in order to focus on the things that matter. The problem is that stuff gets in the way of even knowing what matters. "Trust" applies to letting go of resources that the kids likely won't use for a few years. Here, I'm dispensing with the "we-might-use-it-some-day" mentality. It takes trust to tell myself that if the kids are studying that particular topic in 2 or 3 years, then I will have the resources to provide what they need and most likely it will be a better fit.

Finally, it might seem wasteful, but I decided to recycle or donate books whose pages are yellowing, staple bound (like cheap scholastic books) and any books that have seen better days. I think holding junky books detracts from the innate pleasure of reading. No matter how classic the story is, if the book is beaten up, it's getting chucked.

Now the debate about what to do with all of these books. Some will most definitely go to the library. I can offer homeschooling friends a look-see, but I so hesitate to clutter up their bookshelves. (Any of my friends reading can shoot me an email-trust me, you probably don't want or need what I'm getting rid of).  I may take them to the used book sale at our local homeschool conference next week, but again, that's a lot of energy. I think I'll have more tolerance for expending energy on "stuff" after lent. I've been toying with the idea of letting my older 2 children list books on half.com. Sort of like a mini-business. They can enter them, price them, prepare them for mailing and I can get them to the post office.

I'll let you know how this is going as I work on this area of clutter in the house.

What to Do with the Games

 

A look at our living room. Small on space-large on storage! I know, I know, I

need a serious decorator. My brother painted that watercolor above the mantel of 

Mark's family cabin. It's awesome.

An email from Cheryl inspired me to tackle our games. There are only a few games that I have the patience to sit down with. Even as a kid, I didn't love board games. Mark likes to play, though and the kids also play with each other, so they are worth keeping around.

We don't have an overload of games but we do have some that aren't played as often as others. For this chore, I didn't deal with the various card games we have that I consider more learning or math games. This wasn't an overly burdensome task since the games are stored in a living room cabinet that isn't ideally suited for much else. I do purge them pretty consistently but they can get toppled and messy in there. I don't get how they manage to get all askew-we're talking all rectangular and 2 basic sizes, but somehow they get all sideways and slanted.

Today I purged all the puzzles that the kids have outgrown. Mostly wooden puzzles. I also got rid of a felt board and just a few games. It was only a small box but better at the junk store than in my cabinets.

I don't think anyone's ever played "Operation" the right way, it's just entertaining trying to grab the things and get zapped. The "funny bone" still makes me smile. "Pretty Pretty Princess" is for when my nieces visit. 

Have you seen Sarah's empty drawers and bins? She's my hero. I'm slightly afraid of empty spaces in cabinets and drawers, though. That's a junk magnet waiting to happen in my house. But it is a noble goal and I'm going to get 1.

Wanna see my other cabinets, sure ya do. These are a dream, especially in our kind of small house. I say "kind of" because there aren't too many rooms but except for the living room they feel big.

That is not a can of formula, it's filled with poker chips. It's

a toddler game, cut a hole in the lid and let them plunk away.

I need to pitch that.

More play stuff and some photo albums. I really don't like 

photo albums, I'd rather keep the pictures in boxes in

semi-chronological order or by event.

Stereo, remaining CD's, photos and printer.

The previous owner kept their TV in here so it's

wired.

There you have it, a tour of my living room cabinets. Could be better, could be worse. 

I also cleaned out a couple of drawers in the big computer cabinet. I'll post about that tomorrow.

 

2 Small Successes

#1. I had one of those internal debates again and was going to poll some homeschoolers for help but before I got that far, I decided that it was fine to pitch old math books. The homeschool police probably aren't going to be knocking on my door to make sure my 5th grader completed his 3rd grade book or my 6th grader really actually learned addition way back when. I also concluded that the kids have no interest in browsing through these materials. Maybe most people ALWAYS chuck the old math books after their paperwork is turned in at the end of the year, but I had some insecurities about that. I'll have to do some investigating regarding whether high school transcripts might require samples of higher level math or something. But I think I can safely purge used elementary math books.

#2. At first I was throwing these into a big bag, you know for the  challenge, but that was HEAVY with everything else that was in there. Then I remembered that I was taking a load of junk mail, newpapers and magazines to our church's fundraising recycle bin. I wasn't sure if they accepted school or office paper so I checked the website of the company that provides the bins. DING DING DING. I loved not putting more recyclables in the landfill.

One more thing, I've been shredding like nobody's business around here. I can't believe how long I've allowed totally USELESS paper to take up real estate in our house. Crazy. When a thing has been sitting in a bottom file drawer for more than 10 years and neither of us has looked at it in that amount of time, we're not going to miss it.

Dear Landfill...An Apology and a Promise

I am so so sorry that I'm junking you up. I really didn't mean for this to happen. I honestly thought I'd want all of this stuff for ever and ever, amen. I hope you enjoy the video tapes of me playing basketball, be nice and don't make fun of the terry cloth headband, I needed it at the time. If you're super smart, you could probably commit identity theft. I shredded nearly everything that had our names or SS#'s but if you dig enough, you might get lucky.

I promise NOT to put any old paint in you. I properly dispose of that stuff during our county's hazardous household waste collection. I also promise NOT to buy too much stuff from now on that will make its way to your borders. Thanks for your help. I don't know what I'd do without you.

Truly,
A Recovering Consumer